My girlfriend, Tammy, http://ourdailyways.wordpress.com/, sent me the message that is below. It truly, truly touched me like nothing has for quite sometime. The last couple of sentences are a eye opener, just the eye opener that I needed.
Thank you Tammy!
Welcome To Holland
by
Emily Perl Kingsley
I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It’s just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.
But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.
©1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley.
Thursday, February 05, 2009
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10 comments:
I LOVE THIS! It is so true and Dave got all weepy about it even.
I'm glad it touched your heart. Enjoy Holland. Too many carbs in Italy anyway.
I am sending this to my mom...now. Thank you for sharing.
That's wonderful...thank you so much for sharing it!
what an amazing analogy!! that is so touching and sweet. i love it.
Amazing!
I have read this before and although I do not know personally, I believe that it really helps everyone gain a better understanding. Thanks for sharing
I love this story! I posted it in my own blog last year. I wish I could give it to all my parents at IEP meetings. thanks for posting it.
Wow!
that is so good.
This is ironic since I live in Holland. It is a beautiful place and the Dutch are very different from the rest of the world!!
This is a beautiful analogy; it actually applies to so much more than disable children.
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